maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Randomize
