problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
