you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
