i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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