Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.