no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
