Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize