i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
