Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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