new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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