I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
