how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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