I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
