I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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