my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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