Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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