You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
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I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize