since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
