and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
She's just so happy...and so naked.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
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