im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize