I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
