What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
