just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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