The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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