spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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