Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
The ass gains better be worth it
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