what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Randomize
