Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
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