hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
