Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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