will power is for people who don't want to get laid
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
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