have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
