you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
