I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
