Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
