Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
dude i'm inner monologue high
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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