He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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