Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
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