maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
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