It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize