My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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