Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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