Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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