Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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