Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
