That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
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