she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
