okay pat passed out under dana's car
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
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it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
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Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night