I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
