Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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