yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
